WHY IS MY KNEE HURTING?

2014

I would say that my body has served me well for quite some years now.

I've contorted it, bent, stretched and forced it to do things that would be considered unnatural. It could also be called dancing, with names like ballet, Martha Graham technique, jazz, flamenco and a few other variations.

I've carried plates and glasses, run between tables and served many hungry guests, working as what I would call dancer, but the rest of the world, would probably call, waitress.

I've pushed, pulled and lifted heavy iron weights, and often more times than my body wanted. That would be called weight training, body building to be exact.

I've stroked, kneaded, pushed down and pulled up many naked bodies, also described as Massage Therapy.

For a couple of years I changed diapers, washed and fed, no not babies, but people at the end of their time on this earth. Also heard amazing life stories, comforted fuzzy minds and held a scared hand. Geriatric care, I think the not so human word would be.

I've straightened up, wiped away and straightened out, also called cleaning, both my own home and others.

I have thrown myself down mountains, both with and without wooden sticks under my feet.

I have carried and pulled some of my (and at times my son's) clothes, toothbrushes and a memory or two, through, many places in the world.

I have ingested alcohol, nicotin and a few different drugs (legal and illegal), to feel better, to be happier, to be more relaxed and to be part of a social scene, that swayed between fun and crazy.

I have not eaten, I have stuffed everything in sight into my mouth, I have tried to get it out of my body as fast as possible, felt guilty and started over again, many, many times.

I have broken a couple of bones, twisted an ankle or two and pulled a couple (or more like 100) of muscles.

I have had the inside of my stomach, almost bleed, lost my voice many times, and, of course the biggie, had breast cancer, not once, but actually twice ( that one hurts to mention!, Interesting, will have to look into that).

And now my knee hurts. WHY?

At my age, and having treated "the temple of my soul", the way I have, shouldn't I expect some pain here and there? I mean, shouldn't my body wear out, just like everyone elses? Obviously, i don't think so.

I live in the illusion, that anything is possible, healing is to be had, for everyone and from anything (physically and emotionally). That, the so called, reality, is malleable and available for you to shift, as you like.

All it takes is courage to go deep and be more honest with yourself than you might think is possible. To look and listen, and to honestly feel, everything and........everything. So simple and sometimes so hard.

And just to make sure, there's no blame, no ones fault, you're not being punished, no good or bad, no failing or succeeding. It's just choosing, and nourishing a belief that works for you.