Finding out that I had breast cancer a third time turned all my focus on living and finding a way to heal, yet again.
Then going through chemo my whole purpose was getting through this poisonous treatment the best I could and with as few “injuries” as possible and who even knows what it’s done to my body long term.
Did the smoothies, the vitamins, meditating and visualising, writing and working on the emotional and mental parts help?
My blood levels stayed on a good level, my liver seemed to handle it ok but what about the rest?
I got very tired, exhausted at times, my stomach acted up, my nose bled, my face got swollen and red, my finger tips got a bit of that nerve feeling they talk about and I smelled and tasted chemicals.
The one thing that added energy to my ordeal was this focused and very strong purpose to stay as healthy as possible and to have a very real goal, date and all, on the horizon.
So what now?
I’m continuing my smoothies, eating pretty healthy, added a few anti oxidants etc and, so far has gone for healing but I’m lacking that strong goal and purpose.
When and how do I know that my body has recuperated? How do i know that I’m healthy, strong and back on the track?
What about those parts that can’t be measured, that you don’t notice, that you don’t know are affected?
Yes when my stomach, nose and face go back to normal I’ll of course notice and when my energy level becomes normal again, I will know, but what more is there?
So obvious that with a purpose and a goal staying on the path becomes easier and of course, I already knew that. The goal gives it a direction and an end date and the purpose is what carries you through all the obstacles.
What was different this time is the life and death aspect and that clearly adds some force to the purpose as well as the very uncomfortable signs of “non health” that was a daily reminder of what path I was on.
How will I now know when I’ve reached my goal and when my purpose has been fulfilled?